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ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING
 Hi Everyone,
I’d like to share a formula for living a nicer life. It’s called the 90/10 principle and it’s been attributed to Stephen Covey. Basically, it says that 10% of life is made up of what happens to us, and 90% is decided by how we react. We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we react.
Here’s a quick example. You’re eating breakfast and your daughter knocks your coffee onto your shirt. Suppose you scold your daughter until she breaks down in tears, you criticize your spouse for placing the cup near the edge of the table, then you storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish her breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus, so you rush to the car and drive her to school. You drive too fast, resulting in a traffic fine and a 15-minute delay. Your daughter runs into the building without saying good-bye, and you arrive at the office 20 minutes late, without your briefcase. Your day has gotten off to a terrible start and it only gets worse. You look forward to going home, but when you arrive, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter because of your reaction that morning.
Now, why did you have a bad day? Did the coffee cause it? Did your daughter cause it? Did the policeman cause it? Did you cause it? The answer is, you caused it. You had no control over what happened with the coffee; how you reacted caused your bad day.
Here’s what could have happened. The coffee spills, your daughter is about to cry, and you gently say, “It’s okay, honey. I spill things, too. Sometimes we just need to be more careful.” You rush upstairs, grab a new shirt and your briefcase, and come back down in time to wave to your child as she gets on the bus. You kiss your spouse before you leave, arrive 5 minutes early, and cheerfully greet your coworkers. Both scenarios started the same but ended differently because of how you reacted. Apply the 90/10 principle and it can change your life.
This month’s newsletter is all about choosing your reactions and developing a positive attitude. Thanks for helping me live my fantasy of spreading this BE NICE message and giving nice people a voice.
XOXO, Winn
BE NICE News
Soles4Souls
In the aftermath of hurricanes Katrina and Rita and the Asian tsunami, many relief organizations sprang into existence. One such group was Katrina Shoes, a collaborative effort between several churches who partnered to collect and distribute more than 900,000 pairs of donated footwear. Members of Katrina Shoes went on to form Soles4Souls, a 501(c)3 organization recognized by the IRS and known internationally for its successful efforts to distribute shoes to aid the hurting around the world.
 Soles4Souls notes that Americans have an estimated 1.5 billion pairs of unworn shoes lying in their closets, and the organization can use every one of these pairs to make a tangible difference in someone’s life. Shoe companies, retailers, and individuals can help by donating shoes, donating cash for freight, hosting a shoe drive, or even donating time as a volunteer.
Individuals can round up shoes from their closets, bind each pair together with rubber bands, and send them to one of Soles4Souls’ warehouse facilities. Footwear companies have the means to donate customer returns, factory defects, excess inventory, and cash. Most churches, schools, and civic groups have the means and the population base to hold a footwear drive. Soles4Souls sorts the shoes and categorizes them based on gender, size, and type. When one of their relief partners expresses a need for the shoes, Soles4Souls can fill that “order” with your footwear!
Staff and students at MTI College – A Paul Mitchell Partner School in Sacramento, California made it their mission to collect 100 pairs of shoes in a recent shoe drive for refugee camps in southern Sudan. School dean John Zimmerman said, “Our call was answered. Over 300 pairs of shoes were donated by our future professionals, staff, and faculty for the Soles4Souls campaign. What was gathering dust for many of us is now making life more comfortable for our less fortunate friends in Africa.”
For more information, visit www.soles4souls.org or call (866) 521-SHOE.
A BE NICE Story
Do you have a BE NICE story to share? Send it to editor@BeNiceOrElse.com. If it appears in the newsletter, you’ll receive a BE NICE T-shirt and CD!
We normally include just one letter each month, but we loved both of these stories so much that we just had to share them with you!
 Hi Winn,
In daily life, I felt like I couldn’t always be as nice as I wanted to be because people had a tendency to take advantage of me or to think I was crazy. Your book gave me new hope to try again to be nice in my daily life.
I started school in a city near my home and I was very nice to the teachers and students alike. I brought in food, helped everyone, and brought so much positive energy into the classroom that all the students loved me for making the school a happy place. The director was not a happy person. She called me into the office frequently and told me to stop being so nice to everyone. I decided to change schools.
At my new school, which practices your BE NICE message, I could hardly believe my ears when the students were told from the start that everything in our new school was based on being nice, sharing, and giving hugs and presents to each other. Once I found out it was okay to be nice, I started doing what I know how to do really well! I could be myself again. I was always one of the first students to arrive in the morning and I would welcome all the teachers and students with a smile. I brought in doughnuts or cookies several times and loved seeing the smiles I brought to everyone’s face. I made our class a fun place for all the students. One day, my teacher told me, “I don’t know who you are and from which planet you came, but if you have any more brothers and sisters on that planet, please go there and get them and bring them here.” I had tears in my eyes; this was the most beautiful thing anyone had told me in my life. Finally, after 45 years, I found myself in my true home. I am truly excited to discover that there are still places on this planet where it is safe to just be nice all the time.
Take care,
Benny Spandy
 Hi Winn,
I found this really great story and wanted to share it with you.
There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and noticed she had only three hairs on her head. “Well,” she said, “I think I’ll braid my hair today.” So she did, and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror, and noticed that she only had two hairs on her head. “Hmm,” she said, “I think I’ll part my hair down the middle today!” So she did and she had an amazing day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror, and noticed that she only had one hair on her head. “Well,” she said, “today I’m going to wear my hair in a ponytail.” So she did and she had a fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror, and noticed there wasn’t a single hair on her head. “Yes!” she exclaimed, “I don’t have to fix my hair today!”
Attitude is everything. Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Live simply, love generously, care deeply, and most important, speak kindly.
Love,
Meghan
Cranston, Rhode Island
Monthly Audio Message
 Lyn Christian is known as a woman of courage who is not afraid to help people find, know, and speak their own truth. While she has been called a thought leader, an entrepreneur, a writer, and an innovator, she is most often known for her inspiring coaching and speaking.
As CEO of Soul Salt Inc. Life Strategies and Business Coaching, and CEO of Head Trip Audio, the audio magazine for small business owners, Lyn started her professional journey in academia as a teacher, moved to corporate America, and then arrived as if called to the world of free-agent work and entrepreneurship. She loves to push the envelope in stretching her capacity and experiences and she knows what it’s like to answer the following questions:
- How do I earn my living and live my life by doing only those things that inspire me?
- How do I reinvent my working identity to match my heart and soul?
- How do I go to the next level and who can help me understand what that means and how to get there?
We all understand the role that a sports coach plays for a winning athlete. In this month’s MASTERS interview, Lyn shows how a powerful life and business coach can help anyone fast-track their success.
 Listen in and discover the four basic steps of a coaching session and the five aptitudes that will determine your future success in the work world.
To learn more about Lyn, her company, or her writing and speaking, go to www.soulsalt.com or call (801) 556-9838.
If you enjoyed this month’s audio message, you’ll love our MASTERS Audio Club. CLICK HERE for more information.
People Profile
 A writer, actor, performer, and survivor of two brain cancer surgeries and several near-death experiences, C. W. Metcalf successfully fought leukemia for several years. With a survivor’s joy in being alive, he recorded a 2004 MASTERS Audio Club interview (“When the Going Gets Tough”) and wrote a marvelous book called Lighten Up (available at www.cwmetcalf.com).
Perhaps more than anyone else I’ve ever known, C. W. seemed to understand that attitude is everything. In his March 2007 Fluid News newsletter, in an article titled “The Joy of Chaos,” C. W. wrote:
We can no longer deceive ourselves into believing that we have control of anything that happens outside of us. . . . Finally, we have reached a stage where not only control, but even comprehension of our complex world, lives, and spirits has been utterly shattered. Now, we are in the “real world” where our last stand for control is being waged: control of all we ever had to work with in the first place, control of how we choose to act instead of react, how we choose to view the events of our lives. There is a joy in chaos and unpredictability, but it requires a major shift in how we see ourselves in relationship to the world around us: We must learn the wisdom of Albert Einstein who posited that the perfect answer opens the door to a thousand unforeseen questions; the courage of NBC’s Katie Couric, who turned events that could be seen as tragedy into opportunity to be of value to others; the vision of those yet without eyes to see.
Sadly for us, C. W. lost his final battle with leukemia in June 2007 but his message of finding joy in times of chaos is a wonderful legacy for all of us.
Corporate Corner
Every Business Is a Front for a Church
By Dr. Stella Davis
Founder and President of the Christian Cosmetology International Association
Salon owner, manager, platform artist, and instructor
 Every business can be a front for a church. That doesn’t mean your business has to preach religious doctrine or study religious books. It just means that every business can be a more spiritual place where everyone who walks in the doors feels safe, secure, and welcome because of the way they are treated and the atmosphere they find. As St. Francis of Assisi reportedly said, “Preach the gospel at all times, and when necessary use words.”
By encouraging your staff members to adopt the following practices, you can help make your business a more spiritual place.
1. Prepare for each day’s journey. This means not only getting up, eating breakfast, and exercising, but also centering yourself by taking time to meditate and prepare emotionally and spiritually for whatever you’re going to encounter that day.
2. Go in with a servant’s heart. People in any type of business need to go in with a servant’s heart, meaning that they give of themselves by sharing their talents with others. But you can’t share what you don’t have. To have something worth sharing, you have to be strong spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. The only way you can do that is by taking care of yourself.
3. Get clear on your objectives and goals. I constantly ask myself, What is my purpose for being here? Practices like attending religious services and meditating can help you get clear on your goals and objectives. Once you’re clear about your purpose, then you can confidently move forward, knowing that you’re in the right place, doing the right thing, with the right people, at the right time, to make the right effect on the situation, whatever it may be. Then you can be at peace with yourself.
Remember that life needs to be balanced. We are all three-part beings with a spirit, a soul, and a physical body, and all three parts need to be nourished and fed. To have balance, you have to get the spiritual food, the emotional food, and the natural food you need. Once you receive all those things and are in balance, then you are complete. With that wholeness, you can help other people become whole, too.
Do Something!
By Melissa Giovagnoli
Author of Networlding and Angels in the Workplace
 Gratitude journals have been popular for more than a decade now, since author Sarah Ban Breathnach came out with her Simple Abundance Gratitude Journal. But what about a Do Something Nice journal?
Every day, list the three things you’ve done to make the world a better place. Try it for three weeks. (Remember, it takes 21 days to form a habit.) You’ll find that your actions get more specific and your results get more powerful.
Getting the results you deserve around building a nicer, more productive world is all about making incremental changes over time. Small changes daily make huge differences monthly and transformational differences yearly. Grow your Do Something Nice muscles today. You’ll be glad you did!
For more great ideas from Melissa Giovagnoli, visit www.networlding.com
Quotes of the Month
“The last of the human freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
—Viktor Frankl, Holocaust survivor
“If you think you can, you can. And if you think you can’t, you’re right.”
— Henry Ford
“Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
— Abraham Lincoln
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